She was still standing on the station platform, waiting for the train that was supposed to have left just after eleven. It seemed as if the weather knew what was happening and sympathized. The bright sunshine had gone. She shivered as she looked up at the black clouds that blotted out the sun and threatened rain, not snow. It was bitter. At least it meant she was glad of all the extra layers of clothes under her thick winter coat. She still thought that at any moment she would wake up and find this was just a horrible nightmare.
At last, a train pulled into the station and stopped next to the platform where they stood.
“You all have your identity cards or passports, don’t you?” asked Fräulein Gottlieb. “Remember, if any officials get on to the train don’t say anything unless they speak to you. If they ask any questions, answer as simply as you can, and of course, politely.”
Oh yes, thought Renate. I wouldn’t be without it.
She’d had to say goodbye to Mutti and Vati in the waiting room as they weren’t allowed on the platform. The SS guards had told them that there was to be no hugging or kissing and no crying. Oddly, she hadn’t felt like crying. She’d done plenty of that over the last few weeks. Now it didn’t feel real. She wondered whether Mutti and Vati were still watching. She couldn’t see as there were too many other children on the platform.
Fräulein Gottlieb and the other escorts started shuffling the children on to the train. Renate found herself in a compartment with an older boy, a pair of twins – one boy and one girl about her age – and a couple of little girls.
“Jakob, you’re in charge,” said Fräulein Gottlieb. “And you two older girls please help Christa and Irmgard if they need anything. Please all make sure your tags are visible at all times. And if anybody asks you about the violins, Adelinde and Erich, remember to tell them that you have passed grade eight.” She scuttled off to the next compartment.
The twins had very small suitcases with them. That must have been to make up for the violins. She wondered whether she would go to a family that had a piano. She didn’t play all that well, certainly not grade eight, but she would like to keep on trying.
Jakob stood up and opened the window. “Everyone’s on now,” he said. “I expect we’ll be going in a minute.”
Suddenly a young woman rushed up to him. “Please take her,” she said, handing a bundle to Jakob. “My sister will pick her up when you’re in Holland.”
“But—” Jakob went to protest.
It was too late, though. The train was pulling out of the station.
“What is it?” asked Adelinde.
“It’s a baby,” said Jakob.
Renate’s stomach did a somersault. Somebody had given them a baby to look after: a baby who was not supposed to be on this train. “We’ll have to hide it,” she said.
“Under a coat,” said Erich.
“But make sure she can breathe,” said Adelinde.
The baby was good and slept peacefully. Jakob kept her on his lap but carefully covered by his coat.
“Would you like me to hold her for a while?” asked Renate.
Jakob shook his head. “The mother told me to take care of her.”
The train was beginning to pick up speed. It didn’t seem that anyone wanted to talk. She was glad: she needed to think about all of this. It was too ridiculous. She couldn’t be Jewish. Neither could her mother or her grandmother. Besides, being Jewish shouldn’t mean that she and her mother had to move to a country where they didn’t even speak the language. Then she’d remembered what had happened back in November to the synagogue and all those shops and other businesses owned by Jews.
No, she didn’t want to think about that. She closed her eyes. The motion of the train soon made her fall asleep.
It was dark when she woke up. The train had stopped and Jakob was staring ahead looking rather worried. The baby was still asleep but making little whimpering sounds as if she would wake any moment now.
“We’re almost at the Dutch border,” said Erich. “I expect they’re making sure we’re not taking anything valuable out of the country.”
“If the baby starts crying, will one of you two start making a noise?” said Adelinde to the two little girls. Christa nodded then whispered something to Irmgard.
The compartment door suddenly opened.
“You will all show your papers at once,” said the official. “And open all cases and bags.”
Renate a shuddered as she saw the sinister black uniform. She avoided looking directly in his eyes.
They took their suitcases from the luggage rack. Erich handed Jakob his.
“Can’t you get your own case?” the official asked Jakob.
“I’ve hurt my wrist,” said Jakob.
The official raised his eyebrows and shook his head. “What is in those cases?” he asked, pointing up at the luggage rack.
“Those are our violins,” said Erich.
“Show me,” said the official.
Erich took the two cases down and he and Adelinde opened them.
“They must be worth a mark or two,” he said. “Do you play them?”
“Of course,” said Adelinde. “We have both passed our grade eight exams. We hope to join an orchestra in England.”
“Show me,” said the official.
Adelinde and Erich exchanged a glance.
They took the violins out of the cases and carefully tuned them.
“Bach’s double concerto?” suggested Adelinde.
Erich nodded. “One, two three.”
They started playing. Soon the notes were dancing around each other. They were brilliant.
How did they get those notes out their violins? Renate had tried it once. It had sounded terrible. If she should be lucky enough to have a place with a family that had a piano she would practice for at least an hour every day.
Even the SS officer watched the twins open-mouthed.
Unfortunately, though, the baby also heard the music and wasn’t so impressed. She began to whimper more restlessly. Renate nudged Christa.
The little girl began to howl. “I want my Mummy, I want my Mummy.”
It worked. The music and Christa’s whining was louder than the sounds the baby made.
“All right, all right,” said the official. “That’s enough noise. You may keep your violins.” He scowled at them and moved on to the next compartment.
It was easy enough to stop the music, but the baby was another matter; Christa wouldn’t be able to keep up the noise for much longer.
“Try putting your finger in her mouth,” Renate said. She’d often seen mothers do that to crying babies and it seemed to sooth them.
Jakob pulled a face but did as she suggested. It calmed the baby a little but she still grizzled quietly.
Some children were made to get off the train and carry their suitcases into one of the waiting rooms.
Renate hoped the officers weren't going to make them stay here. She wanted the train to start moving again now. She wanted to get out of Germany.
At last, though, the children came back.
“They’re all there,” said Adelinde. “I counted – twenty went out of this carriage and twenty came back.”
“I wonder if they’ve been allowed to keep all their stuff, though,” said Erich.
“Get in quickly, scum!” shouted one of the SS officers.
Renate held her breath as she saw one of the girls drop her suitcase. It came open and her clothes fell all over the platform. She stopped to pick them up. The SS officer kicked her.
She yelped.
“Get on with it, you piece of filth,” said the officer. “Or you’ll have to stay here.” He pushed the girl on to the train.
The suitcase and most of its contents remained on the platform. The officer picked up the case plus a handful of the contents and threw them into the carriage. The doors were shut and the train started to pull out of the station. A broken doll was left behind.
“At least they should be friendlier at the next stop,” said Jacob. “We’ll be in Holland in a few moments.”
The door of the compartment opened again. It was Fräulein Gottlieb. “Well, done,” she said. “You all handled that very well. How is the baby?”
“You knew all along?” said Jakob.
“Of course,” said Fräulein Gottlieb. “I told the mother to give her to you, but I forgot to give you her milk and spare nappies. I’ve been so busy with some of the smaller children who have been very upset. Some of them don’t travel so well either. But here they are now. Can you try and get her cleaned up and fed before we hand her over to her aunt?”
The incident with the violins and the crying baby had really broken the ice. It turned out that Adelinde and Erich had left a baby brother behind and knew all about nappies and feeding babies.
“At least she’s a girl so she won’t pee in your eye while you’re changing her,” said Erich.
“True,” said Adelinde. “But this nappy is not too nice.”
“Give it to me,” said Jakob. He opened the window and threw it outside. “I hope it lands on some Nazi scum.”
They all giggled.
In no time, they were chatting away with the baby gurgling contentedly. It turned out that Adelinde and Erich were also very good at singing and soon had them all joining in. Renate didn’t know the words to some of the Yiddish songs but she soon picked up the tune.
“So you’re not really Jewish?” said Jakob.
Renate shook her head. “I’d always thought I was German and Catholic.”
“But the Nazis didn’t,” said Jakob. “Because you have Jewish blood.” He shrugged. “It doesn’t bother me that you’re not kosher.”
“No, we’re all in the same boat,” said Erich.
“We soon will be, quite literally,” said Adelinde.
Half an hour later, the train stopped again.
“I expect it will be the Dutch officials now,” said Jakob.
Renate’s stomach did another flip.
“I expect they’ll be kinder than the Germans were.” Jakob pointed out of the window. “Look, we’re actually at a station. I’m going to get out and find this little one’s mother.”
Then he and the baby were gone.
Renate heard the doors of the compartments opening one by one. She could hear women talking softly rather than the harsh voices of border officials.
Theirs opened. A lady appeared with cups of hot chocolate and another held a tray of little cakes. A third carried fluffy blankets and a fourth had some cute teddy bears. The four ladies made a fuss of them, handing them the drinks, cakes and blankets and a couple of the teddy bears to Christa and Irmgard. They seemed so kind and friendly, although Renate couldn’t understand a word they were saying.
The chocolate was delicious. The cake was like nothing she had tasted before – so sweet and spicy – making her realise how hungry she was. She was glad of the blanket, too. It wasn’t that she was cold with all the layers, it was rather that the softness of it was so soothing. However, she couldn’t stop the tears pricking at her eyes.
It had all been such a shock. Finding out she was Jewish and that she had to go away. Then realising that she wasn’t all that Jewish. Yet there were people being kind to her: the Dutch women and Adelinde, Erich and Jakob who had had to leave parents and brothers and sisters behind. At least her uncles would meet her in England and her mother would come over later. But what about Christa and Irmgard? Would they be allowed to stay together? They were so young to be away from their parents.
The Dutch women collected up the mugs and waved cheerily to them. No Dutch officials at all got on. The train began to pull out of the station even though Jakob had not got back.
The tears began to flow freely. Renate could not stop them. Adelinde put her arm round her, Christa held her hand and Irmgard patted her arm.
The compartment door opened and Jakob was there.
“Hey, Renatechen,” he said. “You didn’t think I’d deserted you did you?” He held up a bag bursting with fruit and sandwiches. “She wouldn’t let me go and she’s given us enough food for an army.”
“It’s all right, Renate,” said Fräulein Gottlieb, now standing behind him. “It’s good to cry. You’ll probably feel better.”
She really began to sob now.
“On the other hand, I could tell you one of my jokes,” said Erich, “and that might make you laugh.” He frowned. “Or perhaps not.”
Now she was alternatively laughing and crying. Fräulein Gottlieb was right. It did make her feel better. In no time she was only laughing and the rest were joining in.
YOU THINK A BABY AND A COUPLE OF VIOLINS WILL SAVE YOU? DO YOU THINK WE’RE IMPRESSED? TCH! FILTH. YOU’RE ALL FILTH. GO ON. GET AWAY WITH YOU. ALL OF YOU. GO. AWAY FROM THE FATHERLAND. GOOD RIDDANCE.
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